Six Meat Buffet

This blog is the magnet, and you are steel.

If you have arrived at this site from, then either the main site is down and you've received a 404 error, or the main site is down for maintenance. If you've arrived at this site any other way, you should probably know that the Six Meat Buffet blog is actually at SixMeatBuffet.Com.

This is the backup site for use when things go wrong over at the main site. Which is not uncommon. You can always drop me a line at preston-at-sixmeatbuffet-dot-com or sixmeat-at-gmail-dot-com if you have questions.


Webhost Down

If you've stumbled in here, you'll be pleased/saddened/indifferent to know that Six Meat Buffet is not dead, it's just that our regular webhost at the primary domain is working on stuff and we're temporarily down. No big whoop. I'm sure we'll be back up in short order. In the meantime, go visit Laurie.


Temporary Downtime

If you're here, you were smart enough to bookmark our backup site at some point. Our webhost is running DNS changes and moving sites around and they say we shouldn't be down more than a day or so. Probably just waiting for the changes to propogate the wide world of webs. Hang tight and drink a little more to cope. I know I've already started.


Database Down

My webhost (you get what you pay for) has disabled my database - I have a feeling this is because someone is hitting me with some type of attack. Does anyone have any tips on how to tell which queries are being hit using wordpress & mysql? Thanks (


Thanks, Insty

Thanks to an Instapundit link, our regular host has shut down our site for the remainder of the day. That's why you're here. Our regular site will be back up in the morning - bookmark it because we're usually either hilarious, maddening, offensive or mildly amusing, but seldom boring - The original post follows as written by Six Meat staffer Smantix:

The Shot Heard Round the World

Duck Hunt meets Dick Cheney in the Forest of Friendly Fire.


For everyone else who has been needled by nostalgia over the less than animal friendly version of this game, you can go on to ebaum's world. For the rest of you sickos who root in the lower intestine of near fatal tragedy, proceed.

A swing and a miss

I'm not saying it's time for Cheney to put his guns in the ground. I'm just saying that maybe he should be hanging with different huntin' buddies.


(h/t to Cranky)

UPDATE: Well, after almost 2 years of hacking away at this, we got our first Instalanche. What does that mean? Mad traffic. It also means this site will probably be going down this afternoon due to our 10GB/day throughput quota. Remember the backup site is Thanks, Insty!


Site Issues Update

If anyone out there has experience with apache web servers and knows how to modify the .htaccess file to redirect traffic, I could use the help. Email me at

Thanks to the Commissar and Rob from Say Anything for sending me some ideas.

Freakin' Site Problems

If you're here, you've figured out that my main site ( is temporarily down.

This particular outage is due my Debra Lafave images being freakin' #1 in the google image search for the hot teacher.

As I only have 10 GB traffic alloted per day by my current webhost (POWWEB), which is usually way more than enough, they shut the site down for the day after you reach the 10 GB mark. Yesterday (Nov 22) this happened at about 3:30 pm ET.

I'm trying to get the site removed from google so that crap will stop draining my bandwidth - and in the meantime, I'm trying to manage the traffic to the site by activating and deactivating the root directory so that I can determine when the site goes down and when it's up.

Needless to say, this is a big fat pain in the ass and if you have any ideas on how to get a site off of google's searches, PLEASE let me know. I've tried getting to their "automatic URL removal system" but no dice.

For today and tomorrow (probably) the main site could be up and down more times than Paris Hilton on a random coke dealer. So stay tuned and e-mail me at if you can help.

Incidentally, it figures this would happen when I finally get a coveted Malkin link.


If you're here

You've realized that my regular site is down ( It's been a nasty weekend for dealing with my current webhost. My email is down, then this morning the entire site was down. Now the mySQL database is down and I'm getting no assistance from my webhost. Needless to say, I'm looking for another host right now. In the meantime, keep this site in your bookmarks because there's no telling what the hell is going to transpire.


This blog has moved

This blog has moved to

This is the backup site for those bleak times when my new webserver is down. So run along over there. You're missing cynical commentary!


Fair Warning

Things are going to be unpredictable around here tonight as I update Six Meat Buffet with the new WordPress blog. I'm hoping to pull it off without a major catastrophe, but I'm also prepared for the worst, so there's no telling what you'll see if you happen to pop in tonight.

Fair warning, I say!

Something to keep you busy

I'm sure many of you are wondering what a Tennessee Christmas is really like. Watch this cartoon to find out.

Continued Light Blogging

Sorry for the lack of mockery & hilarity round these parts. Should have the new site up at some point tonight. Hopefully before the end of NYPD Blue, which has officially jumped the shark. Good thing it's the show's final season.


Light Blogging

Things around here are going to be sparse for a little while. The lovely Lisa has transferred me over to Wordpress, and I've got some tweaking to do - so what time I would spend blogging will be spent learning Wordpress and figuring out what the hell I'm doing over there.

In the meantime, go peruse the nice folks on my blogrolls. Well, some of them are nice, some are buttholes, but they're funny, so whatreyagonnado.

One choice post you should check out today is Jennifer's 12 Days of Christmas tribute to MoDo.


Final Voting Plea & Site Redesign

I'm neck-and-neck with both Jane's Armies of Liberation and The Right Blog. You can shoot me up and over them by going and voting before the polls close tonight. However, if you're in Missouri and in a heavily dim-o-crack urban district they may keep the polls open an extra hour or two to "count all the ballocks." For once in your miserable life, don't let me down.


This blog is currently undergoing a brutal disemboweling thanks to Lisa at Elegant Webscapes. She's moving me to WordPress and cleaning the place up. I don't know if that means things will be wacky around here or not, but I can tell you that blogging may be light as I learn my way around WP for a few days. I'll probably be bugging the hell out of you, Johnny Walker Red, so get ready.